Motivation
Sometimes, when I sit in my chair in the early morning to talk to Jesus, he wallops me. I’m thankful Jesus doesn’t use a frying pan, and I’m thankful I don’t spill my morning coffee all over my lap. Jesus walloped me this morning. He caught me off guard by having me read a verse in Ecclesiastes. Ecclesiastes is not the book I normally think, “Ooooo! Ecclesiastes this morning!! This will be encouraging!” Nope. My general approach to Ecclesiastes is to remind myself there is wisdom in the book, and I need to be open to God’s Spirit teaching me a significant lesson. I don’t normally get smashed over the head with verses found in Ecclesiastes, but evidently God thought I needed a bit of shock therapy.
Have you ever believed God has told you to do something, or to be prepared for something and then it seems like God takes his sweet time in bringing everything around so that you can be obedient? That’s where I’m currently living. God nudged my spirit several months ago to make some changes in my employment status. The nudging was actually a year in the making, and when it came I truly sensed God was preparing me for something new that would be exciting, challenging and blessed by Him. I’ve been in the process of making necessary changes so that I’m ready for whatever it is God wants to do (that I’m still kind of in the dark about). I admit that lately I’ve had my doubts. I have contemplated why God would have me change my job. My previous job had great opportunities to be used by Him, to be engaged with a wide variety of people, and to be used in areas where I am gifted. Truth: when it comes right down to it, I’ve been wavering in trusting God. I’ve been questioning if He really wants to use me to move miraculously and make a difference in the world around me.
This morning, I read Ecclesiastes 4:4: “Then I observed that most people are motivated to success because they envy their neighbors. But this, too, is meaningless — like chasing the wind.” Wham!! Jesus distinctly said, “This is you.” Umph. I saw it clearly; in my previous job it was me to a ‘T.’ I was motivated to work hard and move forward because I envied the admiration, accolades, and advantages I saw others achieving. I wanted to be noticed; I wanted moments (too many moments) that were all about me. I wanted the glory and to be recognized as an outstanding winner. I was believing the lie that this would make others like me more, that I would feel successful, that I would be happier . . . and then. . . God could use me.
Jesus is gracious. He didn’t slam me up against the wall and then leave me crumpled in guilt and defeat. He reached out His hand and lifted me with tenderness as He led me to read Ephesians 3:19: “May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Jesus gently whispered, “I complete you with my love. Do you not grasp how much I love you, just as you are?” I realized that I need to invest my time and energies into understanding (with the power of the Holy Spirit) how wide, how long, how high and how deeply God loves me (verse 18).
I’ve heard the comparison of God’s love to an ocean before, I’ve sung about it as I harmonized on the hymn The Love of God, and I’ve seen images with quotes and clicked a quick ‘like!’ This morning God began to help me see the power in that comparison. When I choose to dwell in the unfathomable vastness of God’s love for me, I find myself to be complete, satisfied and content with whatever is. In the truly living each moment within the understanding that I’m loved beyond what I can ever imagine, I find life to be full and fulfilling. Because that’s the power and grace and wonder of God’s love. I still have quite a few questions. I would still love a “This is your New Adventure!” packet to be delivered via snail mail to my front door. And I’m trusting again, resting in the truth that God is faithful and oh, how He loves me.
