How to Live into the Challenge and Blessing of Upheaval
For months, my sweet Pastor husband and I lived in limbo. Earlier in the year, my sweet Pastor husband interviewed for the position of District Superintendent of the Missouri district for the Church of the Nazarene. However, we didn’t discover if he was elected until the district’s assembly on June 1 and 2.
During our season of limbo, we referred to our circumstance by saying “if the thing becomes a thing…” We discussed putting our home on the market and leaving our friends. In addition, we talked about the different ways we could minister in his new role, and we spent a lot of time on Zillow. On June 2, the Missouri District of the Church of the Nazarene elected my sweet Pastor husband to be their District Superintendent. The thing became a thing, and my life is now in upheaval.
Yes to Missouri
I currently live with a mixture of emotions. First of all, I find new adventures exciting and fun. We will move to an area where we have never lived which translates to exploration and discovery! God gave us an opportunity that will stretch our faith and deepen our walk with Him. We will get to make new friends and learn new things.
However, whenever you say yes to something, you also say no to something else. I grieve the loss of the home we moved into just over a year ago. Though I am relieved to stop working, I also grieve the loss of my job and the friends I made there. But more than anything else, I grieve leaving our church and my incredible friends who are like family.
Beginning to Say Goodbye
Sunday, June 8th, my sweet Pastor husband announced his resignation to our church family. One friend described the day as “brutal.” Her word choice was spot on.
That night, as I lay in bed, I couldn’t fall asleep. Now that the thing was a thing, and everyone knew, I recognized I must begin the process to move. I mentally made a list that seemed to have no end.
Up until this point, I held the calm attitude of we’ll just take it one step at a time. God was in control, and I didn’t feel worried or panicked. Now, however, my mind and emotions spiraled out of control
I attempted to rein in my anxiety by singing songs in my head like Great is Thy Faithfulness, and Jesus Loves Me. I wondered if I should get up and do something. However, I feared I would begin a habit that would leave me tired for weeks on end. I felt the upheaval and struggled to rest in God’s peace.
Maintaining Spiritual Habits
The following morning, I sat on the patio and worked on my study of James. I read James 3:13-16 and considered what scripture said about wisdom and understanding. I learned true wisdom is concerned for others. In addition, I learned a wise person is humble and gentle.
I admit, I asked God, “How is this to help me with my feelings of upheaval?” Sure, I wanted to approach moving and our new assignment with wisdom. Plus, God provided a hands-on answer to enable me to manage my fears as He reminded me of James 1:5. “Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God – who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly – and it will be given to him.” (CSB)
Still, as I sat on the patio, coffee cup in hand, I felt my anxiety creep in and attempt to take over. I continued my study and answered the questions in the workbook. Then I wrote in my journal, responding to a set of questions I try to answer every day. As I finished my time, I prayed through Psalm 86 as I do every morning.
Listening to Holy Spirit
“Lord, hear my prayer; listen to my cries for mercy. I call on you in the day of my distress, for you will answer me. Lord, there is none like you among the gods, and there are no works like yours.”
Psalms 86:6-8, CSB
As I read the words ‘there are no works like yours,” Holy Spirit whispered, “You are one of those works.” In that moment, God sweetly gave my spirit the comfort and reassurance I needed. Holy Spirit reminded me God is in the business of transformation.
My sweet Pastor husband and I are in the midst of upheaval. We will feel overwhelmed by our to-do list. We will cry and grieve most days as we also look forward to what God will do in Missouri. And God will use the process of our upheaval to transform us. We are works of Jesus Christ and Holy Spirit.
Summer and Upheaval
Summer is the season of sleeping in, vacation, and relaxation. However, we often feel the tension of kids at home, more yard work to do, and the pressure of fully enjoying the longer and warmer days. We tend to experience a bit of upheaval in our routine when the glorious days of summer arrive.
Allow me to remind you of two things. First, God gives wisdom generously and ungrudgingly. We just need to ask. Second, you are a work of God. God will use whatever this summer brings to transform you to be more like Jesus. You must listen and follow His wisdom.
God is in Control
Paul tells us in Colossians 1:16-17, “For everything was created by [Christ], in heaven and on earth, the visible and the invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities – all things have been created through Him and for Him. He is before all things, and by Him all things hold together.” Jesus is sovereign over everything; He literally holds the world together. Christ can bring order to our chaos, whether our chaos is physical upheaval or mental and emotional upheaval.
Just as Holy Spirit is with me in my journey, Holy Spirit is also with you. Remember, Jesus intercedes for each of us at the throne of God. In addition, even though we will all stumble at some point, Christ offers grace and forgiveness. We can live through and overcome our own unique upheaval. God is great and performs wonders; He alone is God (Psalms 86:10).
You can do Hard Things Photo by Kelli McClintock on Unsplash
