Cleaning my Closet

My email in-box has been inundated with clearance sales from all my favorite stores.  Every day I am sand blasted with 40% off, 50% off — all the way to 70% off!  It’s a shoppers dream!  I admit I have been scouring online for the perfect deal.  

This morning as I spent time alone with Jesus, I read in I Kings 14 and 15.  In those chapters, the Israelites are making poor choices.  They are choosing to follow other gods and God Almighty pulls back His blessing from them.  At times when I read stories in the Old Testament I am overwhelmed. I don’t understand God’s ways; why at times He is gracious, and at times He judges harshly.  I do believe I have begun to understand some of God’s character: He is always working to draw us to him and His deep desire is to have a relationship with His creation. 

As I pondered what I read, I began to wonder about me.  Am I truly living with a heart and attitude that longs to obey?  Do I trust God to provide what I need?  Do I believe that however God chooses to bless me, I will be satisfied?  And if I do trust completely and believe wholeheartedly, why do I spend so much time looking for that special something that I can buy? I know myself well enough to grasp that I love putting pieces together.  I am fascinated by color, shape and style.  So I know that some of my excessive scouring and shopping is partly because of how I am wired.  I also realized this morning that God is challenging me to a deeper level of trust.  God very clearly told me this morning to clean my closet.  

I am pretty sure God doesn’t challenge everyone to clean their closets.  I heard his voice very clearly, and I was obedient.  It sounds a bit strange, but it was fun!  There were some pieces that I immediately threw into the get-rid-of pile.  There were a few I tried on and was pleasantly surprised that they fit better than I remembered.  There were a few pieces I pondered over and struggled to make a valid decision.  As I went through the process I realized how truly blessed I was!  I made a short list of pieces that needed to be replaced, and an even shorter list of a piece or two that I would like to add.  I didn’t need to be scouring sales for more, God reminded me that He really was providing all I needed.  

God gave me a precious gift of freedom this morning.  He released me from the fear of whether or not I am being obedient and/or trusting Him.  He blessed  me with the knowledge that He has satisfied me in so many ways, and then reminded me I just don’t always see it. I still don’t always understand why God does what He chooses to do.  I don’t need to. God is teaching me how exceedingly trustworthy He is, and how amazing and satisfying life is when I am drawn into deeper relationship with Him. 

I am grateful, and I have been deleting all sorts of emails!