Nancy Brewer

Four Powerful Steps to Follow When You Ask “Why?”

It began with an article on Facebook that a friend posted.  I don’t remember what the topic was or even a main idea, but it left me confused and frustrated.  I reread the first paragraph several times hoping something would click, and I would gain comprehension.  Nope.  I closed the article wondering if I was too dense to understand what was being discussed.

The experience with the article set my mind to wandering and wondering.  I realized I often feel confused.  The intensity of people’s passionate protests on various ideas seems excessive to me. Political discussions leave me feeling lost, which, admittedly, is not a new concept in my world.  I ponder why others choose inflammatory verbiage when they state their ideas isolating the people they are trying to sway.

I’m not a simpleton.  I believe I have a sharp mind and can grasp a variety of concepts.  And yet, lately, I’ve just felt lost.  This has led me to ask the big question: “Why?”

Asking the Question Why?

The question “why?” has been flowing in and out of my conscious mind for at least a year. As I processed my journey over the last 12 months, I recognized I have been operating in survival mode; I’ve been doing what must be done. I haven’t had the time, a pressing desire, or the emotional ability to dig out deep answers to my turmoil.

Have you been living there too?

Wanting Answers

When I read through my journal, I notice I have reminded myself often that God is with me.  I think I have clung to that truth so desperately because of an unstated fear: “what if I don’t know where God is? What if I don’t know God at all?” 

In all these mental gymnastics I’ve been leaping through, I’ve discovered I want to see God’s master planning sheet because I want to know what’s coming next.  A schedule of upcoming events would be so helpful. A diagram that explains all that has been happening and how it will be resolved would be reassuring.

In John 13 Jesus washes the disciples’ feet and gives them an example of what servanthood looks like. Jesus tells His disciples in verse 7, “You don’t understand now what I am doing, but someday you will.” (NLT) I can easily imagine the confusion and frustration they must have been feeling.  I find myself struggling to figure out what God is doing because what He is doing is not what I thought would be ideal or helpful.

Oh how I want the someday to be now. Are you with me?

Discovering God’s Thoughts

Thankfully, scripture instructs us concerning God’s thoughts.

  • Psalm 139:17 tells us God’s thoughts are vast.
  • Isaiah 55:8-9 clarifies that His thoughts are not like ours; His thoughts are beyond ours.
  • Jeremiah 33:3 states He knows great and incomprehensible things that we know nothing about.
  • Psalms 40:5 reminds us that God’s deeds and thoughts toward us are more than can be told.
  • Isaiah 40:12-14 paints the picture of our all-knowing God. No one can counsel Him or give Him understanding. No one has taught Him knowledge.

Every wondering we have, every “why?” we express, God knows the answer.  This gives me great assurance and a deep ache because of the truth in John 13:7. So many times we are waiting for the “someday.”

We need to grasp the depth of difference between our thoughts and God’s thoughts.

First, we need to recognize the way we think needs to be transformed.

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.”

Romans 12:2 NLT

The way we think leads us to be self-protecting and self-promoting.  We naturally process how to create a life that benefits ourselves, but God’s way of thinking is in drastic contrast. Jesus wants us to live a life of servanthood just as He displayed in John 13.

Second, we need to become students of the Word so that we can be transformed.

“All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives.  It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.  God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do very good work.”

2 Timothy 3:16-17 NLT
Photo by Rachel Strong on Unsplash

God’s thoughts on life are found in the Bible.  He wants us to know how He thinks and what He thinks is significant. We may not understand everything, and God faithfully teaches us what He wants us to know in the moment.  We need to place ourselves in a position to learn.

Third, we must trust God.

“I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything.  I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little.  For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

Philippians 4:12-13 NLT

We normally read these verses and apply them only to physical needs.  The truth in these verses is that God understands all our limitations and provides all we need to do what He asks of us.  We can live faithfully, with joy and hope, even if we don’t understand any of what God is doing.  He gives the strength we need.

Lastly, remember God’s thoughts are FOR us.

“The Lord is my shepherd; I have all that I need. He lets me rest in green meadows; he leads me beside peaceful streams… even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me…Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life…”

Psalms 23

God cares deeply for each of us.  A shepherd provides for every detail of a sheep’s life.  He gives safety, protection, sustenance, and rest.  The shepherd knows the sheep are his complete responsibility.  God is fully aware we are totally reliant on who He is and His provision.  Psalm 23:4 tells us God is close beside us; he gives protection and comfort even when we are journeying through the darkest days. Verse 5 informs us we could be surrounded by the enemy and God will still lay a spread of provision before us. 

Waiting for “Someday”

Allow me to remind each of us of the truth in John 13:7: we may not realize what God is doing in the moment.  When we our confused and our hearts resound with an echoing “Why?!” we need to review the four steps we’ve discussed today.

  1. Allow God to transform our thinking.
  2. Study God’s Word to be in a position of transformation
  3. Trust God
  4. Remember God is always for us.

Someday is coming.  To God be the glory.

I’m praying for you.

Question Mark Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

2 thoughts on “Four Powerful Steps to Follow When You Ask “Why?”

  1. While on vacation at my daughter’s home, she played a video of the VAST universe that God has created. It took me on a ride through the galaxies and stars to places no one can possibly see from our earth. The amazing view from those far away places, the perfect order of each movement of each star or planet, and just how FAR away many of His lights in the sky are from earth was almost too much to comprehend. The video journey took us (as if we were flying) from the far reaches all the way back to earth. Reading about HOW BIG our God is from His Word and then having those video images in my head helps me to remember in the Whys of life that IF HE CREATED ALL THIS AND PUT little old me on this really very small earth, and chose to LOVE little old me,…well the answers to the whys don’t seem so urgent. I’m in His Hands. He’s in control.

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