How to Love Sincerely and Rejoice with Others Well

Our backyard is still dirt, just dirt. My sweet Pastor husband works diligently to get all the landscape pieces in place. He created a rock border, laid down weed barrier, and added a drip system.

We are currently in the process of purchasing and planting bushes, which will then require more drip system adaptation. After all that is accomplished, he will rototill the ground with compost and finally seed for grass. I honestly thought I’d be enjoying a backyard by now.

A Gift of Free Sod

I recently received an excited text message from a friend who was gifted free sod. She and her husband moved into their new home several months before we moved into our home. We consistently share the joys and struggles of building a new home.

“Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep.”

Romans 12:15

Romans 12 Context

In last week’s blog, I gave some background to Romans 12. I mentioned the chapter begins with Paul challenging the believers in Rome to present themselves to God as living sacrifices. He warned them against conforming to the culture around them. In addition, He counseled them to be unified, and love each other deeply.

I truly was happy for my friend. I found it easy to rejoice with her because I was aware of the frustration of living with just dirt when summer windstorms blew in. However, God chose to teach me that to truly rejoice with her, I needed to not make it about me.

Struggling to Rejoice with Others

We all struggle at times to rejoice with others for a variety of reasons. We envy their good fortune. At times, we express anger toward God because we fear He won’t be as good to us. We could perceive the blessing someone else received is unfair; we think we deserved the gift more.

Love Others Sincerely

The ability to rejoice with others, and even grieve with others, is based on the command to love others sincerely. Paul tells us we are to abhor what is evil, cling to what is good, be devoted to one another, and honor others more than we honor ourselves (Romans 12:9-10).

However, we cannot love others sincerely in our own strength. We need the help of the Holy Spirit. He is the One who teaches and trains us to offer ourselves in absolute service to Jesus the King.

How can we better align ourselves with Christ when we struggle with loving others well? Paul offers us great wisdom in Romans 12. The Spirit revealed four things to me that we can do when we struggle to fully rejoice and/or grieve with others.

Cling to the Good

First of all, we must cling to the good (Romans 12:9). We don’t always find it easy to define what is good. I would say free sod is good, but God didn’t choose that good for me.

Jesus Christ is the only one who is good and can define what is good in each and every circumstance. He is the goodness we are to crave. When we look at scripture, we learn God’s goodness is all about bringing us into deeper relationship with Him.

For us to cling to what is good, we must learn to identify how God is being good to us. Plus, we need to express gratitude for whatever good God provides. When we struggle to be thankful, we need to learn to pray for God would change our attitude.

Align With God not the World

Second, we must identify how we align more with the world than with God. Paul tells us we are transformed by the renewing of our mind. The devil is subtle and often we are unaware we have begun to create our own definition of good.

I know as I spend time in God’s Word, I grow best when I ask the Spirit what He wants to teach me. We read scripture to learn about God and His ways. We must seek the Holy Spirit’s wisdom to enable us to decipher His interpretation of The Word from ours. Then, we submit to His authority in regard to our choices, attitude, behavior, and dreams.

Maintain an Honest View of Yourself

Thirdly, we must choose to not see ourselves as all that. Paul states in Romans 12:3, “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment…” We can be aware of talents and gifting God has given us. AND we must always remember who equipped us in such a way.

The author of Hebrews reminds us we can’t please God without faith. (Hebrews 11:6) We can’t achieve recognition from God because we excel at something. Neither can we obtain entrance into His presence because we attained a certain level of behavior. We are nothing without the love and grace of God, so we must humble ourselves and submit to His sovereignty.

We are Living a Journey

We are living the journey back to the life God designed. He sent Jesus so that our sins could be atoned, and the Holy Spirit could dwell within us. We have been given life with God, but God has yet to fulfill the perfect life He intends for us.

We live a good life. Plus, we are moving toward God’s ideal life. Therefore, we can’t expect everything in our current circumstances to be perfect. We must live within the framework God is good to us, and this world isn’t the world He wants for us.

Experience the Abundance of God’s Love

God, in His mercy, gives us abundant life. We don’t get to define abundance, only God knows what is best. We can be assured that life is filled with opportunity to continually experience God’s love. From there, while we confidently live in the truth of God’s love for us, we can love others well. We can learn to rejoice with those who rejoice.

My backyard is dirt, and my friend’s backyard is a beautiful shade of green. When I look at her yard, I gain hope for my yard. I see the goodness of God to her, and I am encouraged to trust God’s goodness for me. I rejoice with her as she rejoices because God is teaching me to lean into His love so I can love others well.

Rejoicing with Others Photo by Levi Guzman on Unsplash